Shattered and Reclaimed
In October 2020, my world was forever shattered. My eldest son, Harrison Kirby VanMeter known to the lyrical world as CARTER (Critical Armed Ready To End Receiver) Hayze—was a radiant light with hazel eyes and a profound spirit that touched everyone he met. But when suicide claimed his life, it didn’t just take my son; it took a part of me as well. Harrison wasn’t just my child he was intertwined with my identity, and losing him left me devastated in ways I never thought possible.
For years, journaling and helping others were my cornerstones, my lifelines. Writing gave me clarity, healing, and a way to share my voice with the world. But in the wake of Harrison’s death, the words disappeared, and I found myself adrift, grappling with grief that seemed insurmountable. Who was I without the tools that had once anchored me? How could I find my way back when the storm of loss had taken everything, I knew about myself?
Shattered and Reclaimed is a raw and unflinching exploration of my journey through heartbreak, unimaginable loss, and the desperate search for purpose in the aftermath. It is a story of enduring love, the transformative power of grief, and the slow, painful steps toward healing and rediscovery.
This book is not only a tribute to Harrison but also a lifeline to those navigating their own loss. It’s for anyone who has felt broken, lost, or unsure if they can ever find their way again. Shattered and Reclaimed reminds us that even in the deepest darkness, there is a path forward a way to reclaim our lives, redefine our purpose, and honor the love that never truly leaves us.
In October 2020, my world was forever shattered. My eldest son, Harrison Kirby VanMeter known to the lyrical world as CARTER (Critical Armed Ready To End Receiver) Hayze—was a radiant light with hazel eyes and a profound spirit that touched everyone he met. But when suicide claimed his life, it didn’t just take my son; it took a part of me as well. Harrison wasn’t just my child he was intertwined with my identity, and losing him left me devastated in ways I never thought possible.
For years, journaling and helping others were my cornerstones, my lifelines. Writing gave me clarity, healing, and a way to share my voice with the world. But in the wake of Harrison’s death, the words disappeared, and I found myself adrift, grappling with grief that seemed insurmountable. Who was I without the tools that had once anchored me? How could I find my way back when the storm of loss had taken everything, I knew about myself?
Shattered and Reclaimed is a raw and unflinching exploration of my journey through heartbreak, unimaginable loss, and the desperate search for purpose in the aftermath. It is a story of enduring love, the transformative power of grief, and the slow, painful steps toward healing and rediscovery.
This book is not only a tribute to Harrison but also a lifeline to those navigating their own loss. It’s for anyone who has felt broken, lost, or unsure if they can ever find their way again. Shattered and Reclaimed reminds us that even in the deepest darkness, there is a path forward a way to reclaim our lives, redefine our purpose, and honor the love that never truly leaves us.
In October 2020, my world was forever shattered. My eldest son, Harrison Kirby VanMeter known to the lyrical world as CARTER (Critical Armed Ready To End Receiver) Hayze—was a radiant light with hazel eyes and a profound spirit that touched everyone he met. But when suicide claimed his life, it didn’t just take my son; it took a part of me as well. Harrison wasn’t just my child he was intertwined with my identity, and losing him left me devastated in ways I never thought possible.
For years, journaling and helping others were my cornerstones, my lifelines. Writing gave me clarity, healing, and a way to share my voice with the world. But in the wake of Harrison’s death, the words disappeared, and I found myself adrift, grappling with grief that seemed insurmountable. Who was I without the tools that had once anchored me? How could I find my way back when the storm of loss had taken everything, I knew about myself?
Shattered and Reclaimed is a raw and unflinching exploration of my journey through heartbreak, unimaginable loss, and the desperate search for purpose in the aftermath. It is a story of enduring love, the transformative power of grief, and the slow, painful steps toward healing and rediscovery.
This book is not only a tribute to Harrison but also a lifeline to those navigating their own loss. It’s for anyone who has felt broken, lost, or unsure if they can ever find their way again. Shattered and Reclaimed reminds us that even in the deepest darkness, there is a path forward a way to reclaim our lives, redefine our purpose, and honor the love that never truly leaves us.